Thursday, September 20, 2012


In my previous blogs I’ve been filling you in on what I’ve considered doing with the rest of my life. This blog is going to be a change in pace, because after this weekend I’ve thought about what it is that I absolutely cannot do:

·         Fast Food
·         Event Planning
·         Anything that involves working with tools

So to explain my aversion to the fast food industry I’ll have to take you back in time to a moment when a young guy naively thought he would take on any job for some extra cash. This guy, who lived in parallel time space called “jobless summer,” decided to work at the Golden Arch (McDonald’s). He thought that working at McDonald’s might be the easiest job any human being could ever have. His good friend always assured him that “anyone could flip burgers.” But, the guy’s friend was wrong. For, little did he know that some people like their burgers with no meat, just the bun.  Little did he know that some people, when they hear the words “fast food” tend to think that the food has been waiting for them all this time, and that all they had to do was ask. Little did he know that customers can, and are oftentimes, unsatisfied with the food they have ordered. Though McDonald’s management tried long and hard to find a position where that young man might find his Mcplace in life, nothing seemed to fit. He was too slow on fries. He didn’t know what to do at the cash register (since when did c3 indicate a large drink?). And he didn’t seem to have what it takes to really give each table the Mcpolish it deserved. The young man, in despondency, realized that McDonald’s wasn’t for him; he quit after his sixth day. In case you haven’t realized it yet, that guy was me.
Rewind a summer back, to the summer before my junior year, and you’d find a Ryan who was slightly optimistic about volunteering for Habitat for Humanity. Though I had never really considered myself a walking talking tool belt, I thought perhaps working with Habitat for Humanity might help me discover my inner craftsman. Little did I know, however, that if I had a hammer, I would probably hammer a hole in some wall. Little did I know If I had some insulator, I’d probably cut it too small and nail it in wrong. It didn’t take me too long to figure out that working with my hands wasn’t necessarily my life calling. Now if only I could find the family that is currently living in my little test run. 

Fast forward to the present and you’ll find a Ryan who realized this past weekend that he could never be an event planner. My best friend is getting married this weekend. I’ve known now, for about 6 months, that I was going to be the best man. What I didn’t realize, however, is that I’m a terrible procrastinator. So, it wasn’t until this past weekend that I set up the time and date for a bachelor’s party. At the end of the day, because I wrote everyone on such short notice, only three individuals could show up. Those three people consisted of myself, the groom, and one of those groomsmen. Though we had a good time (I managed to get both the groom and groomsman to ride a mechanical bull), I will never take on that kind of responsibility again. It’s too much pressure if you ask me.
So now, I’ll just cross my fingers and hope that I get this Teach for America position. I find out tomorrow if I move on to the next round. Keep your fingers crossed for me, or else you might get stuck with having me flip your burger, build your home, or plan your wedding. I didn’t mean to scare you like that. I could just really use your support.

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